This was me last night...will post later.
Please stop talking so loudly.
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Girls That Would NOT Make My Showchoir 2
So Kevin has decided to make his senior portrait segment a weekly thing, I will do the same with my "Girls that would NOT make my showchoir" segment. Thanks for the comments everyone. Keep them coming!!
What is she licking?? This is showchoir, not Sex Education 101.
I can count on two hands how many years I be up in showchoir.
Doctor, it itches somewhere in this general area.
AND THE NUMBER ONE PERSON OF THE WEEK THAT WOULD NOT MAKE MY SHOWCHOIR IS (DRUMROLL PLEASE).......
KIMBERLY STEWART!! Need I say more. She is a waste of space.
Thanks, DGD
What is she licking?? This is showchoir, not Sex Education 101.
I can count on two hands how many years I be up in showchoir.
Doctor, it itches somewhere in this general area.AND THE NUMBER ONE PERSON OF THE WEEK THAT WOULD NOT MAKE MY SHOWCHOIR IS (DRUMROLL PLEASE).......
KIMBERLY STEWART!! Need I say more. She is a waste of space.Thanks, DGD
So Much To Say
First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATTHEW GODFREY! Only 365 more days to go. And thanks for your spellbinding recollection of...I can't describe...Coral.
Now, it has come to my attention that I called approximately 39 people early Saturday morning. Here now, the explanation: Friday night, three of my coworkers and myself were at the End Zone (great bar) and around closing time (2:00 am) we decided to go to New Orleans. I know, cut to the chase...so we get to New Orleans around 4 am after much drinking at the bar on my part and a good bit on the way down. We proceed to Tropical Isle for hand grenades...and here's where it gets ugly. I think. I'm not real sure what happened after that, but at some point on the ride home, Jonathan coerces me into believing that I had in fact seen Lindsay Lohan (or, if you listened to my messages, I believe I referred to her as "Hohan"). Upon sobering up the next evening, I was informed that that did not happen. I'm very very sorry for any confusion and misleadingnesses. I know its not a word. At that point, with a blood alcohol level of about 3.9, I would have believed pretty much anything. Many apologies.
Now, I would like to thank all of you who submitted senior portraits for the weekly senior portrait roundup. I did receive one from someone in Minnesota (thanks!), but upon inspection, it looked like a girl who kinda looks like Katie (or Kate) Holmes. While I appreciate the effort, I was looking more for hideous senior portraits. If I missed something in that pic, let me know. But thank you, really!
Girl on the left, you're definately taller. Yes, even with the fedora. Does that settle it? Note to readers...I don't care what these oddly matching girls or Kevin Federline says...NO FEDORAS! Just fedon't.
Sadly, while perusing senior portraits, I noticed a disturbing trend...the non-flattering silhouette. Is the focus here supposed to be on her mousy brown hair? The wierd water color background? If she's hiding hideous scarring on the left side of her face, then I guess this pose is acceptable.
I'm glad to see those little things flying around in the Lord of the Rings movies are getting educations and moving on to their senior years. Seriously...I'm speachless.
Ok, is Chompers here graduating? I thought the emphasis in senior portraits was on the seniors? By the way, nice nappy red perm to match your red shirt. Classic.
Hmmm. Umm. I give up. What the hell is going on in this picture? Sad part of this picture? Well, one of many...this was found on this photographer's website. Yes, this gothmess is an advertisement. Maybe a rival photographer posted this on his site to lure customers away.
David...is that you?
Again, I'm going to assume hideous scarring.
Clearly, Michael here was summoned from the lab to shoot this one. Seriously, people...have someone else look at your wardrobe before you have it immortalized for all of time. (But a big thank you from all of us to all of you who don't...what else would we be laughing at now?)
Ok, MJ...first of all...WHAT IS THAT BACKGROUND? Secondly...WHY IN THE HELL ARE YOU POSING LIKE THAT? Third...I just...I...jus...I don't get kids today. Seriously...what is that background?
And, finally, the lesbians were complaining that we had nothing for them...so here we go...young, same-sex, pure, forbidden love.
Sorry, kids...its been a long day (as a result of a long night) so I'm sorry there weren't more, and I'm sorry the captions weren't wittier...but deal with it. And seriously...EMAIL ME PICTURES!
Lastly...Brit...come back!
Have a blessed day, children.
Shout out to my girl Jan!
Now, it has come to my attention that I called approximately 39 people early Saturday morning. Here now, the explanation: Friday night, three of my coworkers and myself were at the End Zone (great bar) and around closing time (2:00 am) we decided to go to New Orleans. I know, cut to the chase...so we get to New Orleans around 4 am after much drinking at the bar on my part and a good bit on the way down. We proceed to Tropical Isle for hand grenades...and here's where it gets ugly. I think. I'm not real sure what happened after that, but at some point on the ride home, Jonathan coerces me into believing that I had in fact seen Lindsay Lohan (or, if you listened to my messages, I believe I referred to her as "Hohan"). Upon sobering up the next evening, I was informed that that did not happen. I'm very very sorry for any confusion and misleadingnesses. I know its not a word. At that point, with a blood alcohol level of about 3.9, I would have believed pretty much anything. Many apologies.
Now, I would like to thank all of you who submitted senior portraits for the weekly senior portrait roundup. I did receive one from someone in Minnesota (thanks!), but upon inspection, it looked like a girl who kinda looks like Katie (or Kate) Holmes. While I appreciate the effort, I was looking more for hideous senior portraits. If I missed something in that pic, let me know. But thank you, really!
Girl on the left, you're definately taller. Yes, even with the fedora. Does that settle it? Note to readers...I don't care what these oddly matching girls or Kevin Federline says...NO FEDORAS! Just fedon't.
Sadly, while perusing senior portraits, I noticed a disturbing trend...the non-flattering silhouette. Is the focus here supposed to be on her mousy brown hair? The wierd water color background? If she's hiding hideous scarring on the left side of her face, then I guess this pose is acceptable.
I'm glad to see those little things flying around in the Lord of the Rings movies are getting educations and moving on to their senior years. Seriously...I'm speachless.
Ok, is Chompers here graduating? I thought the emphasis in senior portraits was on the seniors? By the way, nice nappy red perm to match your red shirt. Classic.
Hmmm. Umm. I give up. What the hell is going on in this picture? Sad part of this picture? Well, one of many...this was found on this photographer's website. Yes, this gothmess is an advertisement. Maybe a rival photographer posted this on his site to lure customers away.
David...is that you?
Again, I'm going to assume hideous scarring.
Clearly, Michael here was summoned from the lab to shoot this one. Seriously, people...have someone else look at your wardrobe before you have it immortalized for all of time. (But a big thank you from all of us to all of you who don't...what else would we be laughing at now?)
Ok, MJ...first of all...WHAT IS THAT BACKGROUND? Secondly...WHY IN THE HELL ARE YOU POSING LIKE THAT? Third...I just...I...jus...I don't get kids today. Seriously...what is that background?
And, finally, the lesbians were complaining that we had nothing for them...so here we go...young, same-sex, pure, forbidden love.
Sorry, kids...its been a long day (as a result of a long night) so I'm sorry there weren't more, and I'm sorry the captions weren't wittier...but deal with it. And seriously...EMAIL ME PICTURES!
Lastly...Brit...come back!
Have a blessed day, children.
Shout out to my girl Jan!
GUEST POST - "Welcome to the Real World"
So we have decided to start having a guest poster every once in a while if we hear a story from them that we deem worthy. Matthew Godfrey had the pleasure of hearing Coral and Landon from Real World fame speak at the University of Southern Mississippi's orientation. Congratulations Matthew Godfrey on being selected as our first guest poster.
"I don't fight, I don't argue, I just beat that bitch wit' a bottle" - Coral
I will begin my post by safely assuming that all readers are familiar with Coral Smith from The Real World season 10 "Back to New York." If you aren't, you may want to reconsider before any further appraisal of this composition. Last night, I had the erratic and noteworthy opportunity of seeing Coral in person. I am currently serving as a USM orientation leader as a part of Southern's first year experience program. Our theme this year for Welcome Week is Welcome to the Real World. And..boy has it turned out to be a real treat. In keeping with the theme, Southern Miss invited both Coral and Landon Lueck from season 15 Philadelphia to speak at last nights opening convocation. The moment we had all been waiting for, drum roll please, Coral appears in a pair or sewn-on jeans with the waist line descending at least 12 inches below her exposed mid-drift, a white wife-beater that I presuppose she purchased at Baby Gap, and a straw cowboy hat and boots to match. Coral was asked to come and verbalize her account of what college was like as a Freshman. We expected humor, crudeness, and even vulgarity from Coral, we got so much more. As if her outfit alone wasn't enough to leave my jaw on the floor, Coral began by introducing herself, along with her titties, to the crowd by asking one of the new Freshman men to come and retrieve a slip of paper that she had hidden amongst her cleavage. Throughout her ten minutes on stage, I think Coral made use of the word fuck more single times than I have ever heard in my entire life combined. Congratulations Coral. I was amazed by her ability to motivate the new students with phrases like "What's the big fucking deal about being a freshman?" and "You mothafuckas have four more fucking shitty years left." Upon realizing that some people were appalled at her language, she preceded to ask the crowd what the big deal was, and if she had landed in the mothafuckin bible belt? To top it off Landon made a comment about wearing a condom and having safe sex. Don't even get Coral started. She wanted to make sure the ladies plan to use protection too. She made the comment "I know we got some fuckin lesbians in the crowd!" With little response she continued "I know some of your mothafuckin bitches like to eat pussy!!" Don't reread. That's correct. Pussy. Over the loudspeaker in front of Southern Miss' new students, orientation leaders, parents, faculty, and administration. Way to go Coral. While being escorted off-stage, She was able to form some sort of apology by acknowledging our lack of censorship, she explained that she is used to MTV bleeping out her obscenities. Awesome Coral, your refinement and sophistication astounds me. And by the way, welcome to the real world Southern Miss students!
"I don't fight, I don't argue, I just beat that bitch wit' a bottle" - Coral
I will begin my post by safely assuming that all readers are familiar with Coral Smith from The Real World season 10 "Back to New York." If you aren't, you may want to reconsider before any further appraisal of this composition. Last night, I had the erratic and noteworthy opportunity of seeing Coral in person. I am currently serving as a USM orientation leader as a part of Southern's first year experience program. Our theme this year for Welcome Week is Welcome to the Real World. And..boy has it turned out to be a real treat. In keeping with the theme, Southern Miss invited both Coral and Landon Lueck from season 15 Philadelphia to speak at last nights opening convocation. The moment we had all been waiting for, drum roll please, Coral appears in a pair or sewn-on jeans with the waist line descending at least 12 inches below her exposed mid-drift, a white wife-beater that I presuppose she purchased at Baby Gap, and a straw cowboy hat and boots to match. Coral was asked to come and verbalize her account of what college was like as a Freshman. We expected humor, crudeness, and even vulgarity from Coral, we got so much more. As if her outfit alone wasn't enough to leave my jaw on the floor, Coral began by introducing herself, along with her titties, to the crowd by asking one of the new Freshman men to come and retrieve a slip of paper that she had hidden amongst her cleavage. Throughout her ten minutes on stage, I think Coral made use of the word fuck more single times than I have ever heard in my entire life combined. Congratulations Coral. I was amazed by her ability to motivate the new students with phrases like "What's the big fucking deal about being a freshman?" and "You mothafuckas have four more fucking shitty years left." Upon realizing that some people were appalled at her language, she preceded to ask the crowd what the big deal was, and if she had landed in the mothafuckin bible belt? To top it off Landon made a comment about wearing a condom and having safe sex. Don't even get Coral started. She wanted to make sure the ladies plan to use protection too. She made the comment "I know we got some fuckin lesbians in the crowd!" With little response she continued "I know some of your mothafuckin bitches like to eat pussy!!" Don't reread. That's correct. Pussy. Over the loudspeaker in front of Southern Miss' new students, orientation leaders, parents, faculty, and administration. Way to go Coral. While being escorted off-stage, She was able to form some sort of apology by acknowledging our lack of censorship, she explained that she is used to MTV bleeping out her obscenities. Awesome Coral, your refinement and sophistication astounds me. And by the way, welcome to the real world Southern Miss students!
Monday, August 22, 2005
Friday, August 19, 2005
The Heat Is On
Salutations, salutations! I'm tired, hot, and really really hungover. I think Tara Reid's liver might be in better shape than mine. Eh, that's pushing it.
Moving on. Britney is apparently now in her 23rd month of pregnancy. Its time for little Preston to make his way out. Now.
Remember when Nicole had breasteses?
Good times, good times.
Sarah Michelle Gellar is looking good these days. But what does she do now? I haven't seen any pictures of her cavorting around with Hohan, Nicole, Paris, or Tara. Maybe she and Freddie do arts and crafts.
Homemade macrame plant holders for everyone this Christmas!
What is Josh Groban doing at the same event as SMG and Nicole? Great, now he's going to be cavorting around with Hohan, Nicole, Paris, and Tara....shan't be too much longer until he's popping valtrex and penicillin like its candy.
Just a reminder, everyone...MORGAN IS DATING!
Eh, I think I'm over this post. Sorry, ya'll...the heat is getting to me.
Come back soon!
Have a blessed day, children.
Moving on. Britney is apparently now in her 23rd month of pregnancy. Its time for little Preston to make his way out. Now.
Remember when Nicole had breasteses?
Good times, good times.
Sarah Michelle Gellar is looking good these days. But what does she do now? I haven't seen any pictures of her cavorting around with Hohan, Nicole, Paris, or Tara. Maybe she and Freddie do arts and crafts.
Homemade macrame plant holders for everyone this Christmas!
What is Josh Groban doing at the same event as SMG and Nicole? Great, now he's going to be cavorting around with Hohan, Nicole, Paris, and Tara....shan't be too much longer until he's popping valtrex and penicillin like its candy.
Just a reminder, everyone...MORGAN IS DATING!
Eh, I think I'm over this post. Sorry, ya'll...the heat is getting to me.
Come back soon!
Have a blessed day, children.
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Some things be getting on my nerves
LAZY PARKING LOT PEOPLE
So I was at Wal-Mart today and I had a buggy full of stuff. I had lucked out and got a pretty good parking space so I didn't have far to walk to my car. Well it was going to take at least 5 minutes to unload the groceries into my car. This car stopped in the middle of the parking lot waiting to get my spot just as I was pulling the buggy up to my car. I think he was following me so he could get my spot. His 42-foot long Lincoln Towncar was blocking the entire parking lot waiting and waiting for me to put my stuff in the car. I felt pressured to hurry because I was getting dirty looks from him because he wanted my spot and dirty looks from the rest of the parking lot because they were blocked. The crazy thing is there was another empty spot 3 SPACES DOWN! Does this get on your nerves as bad as it does mine?? Is it really worth it to wait 5 or more minutes and piss everybody off in order to save 10 feet of walking. I mean, really.
AMERICAN IDOL
Auditions are coming up for the next installment of American Idol. I had thought about going, but that is the day I start student teaching. I guess its not meant to be. It just doesn't work out year to year. I actually have NO desire to be an american idol, I'm just obssessed with the show. I would LOVE to meet Paula, Randy, and Simon. You know you're a hardcore American Idol fan when you have been to the AI Concert Tour. (AI is what us hardcore fans like to call it) Some friends of mine and I met in Nashville and attended the American Idol Season One Concert. Unfortunately, they served alcohol so none of us remember much after the first few songs. Later, we all joked about what losers we were for going. Its pretty sad that we paid $50 each and drove to Nashville to attend a concert that was sponsored by PopTarts Snack Stix. I'll never grow up.
DECIDE ON A NAME ALREADY!!!
Everybody knows Sean Combs. He is a famous rapper. Well Sean Combs wasn't working for him, so he changed it to Sean "Puffy" Combs. All was well until he felt like he was outgrowing the name, "Puffy". It was soon changed to "Puff Daddy". Well we thought we had finally reached the end, but no. He later shortened that name to "P Diddy". I guess he got tired of the "P" because now it has been officially changed to just "Diddy". I mean, really. Is all of this necessary? He said that with the new name change he feels like he is letting his guard down and becoming fully exposed. How is dropping one letter from your name and throwing a press conference about it letting your guard down? I love celebrities. I read where 1 in 4 people have what you call "Celebrity Obssession". I am definitely guilty of this, but sometimes I just want to say "GET OVER YOURSELF".
Peace. D-Diddy
So I was at Wal-Mart today and I had a buggy full of stuff. I had lucked out and got a pretty good parking space so I didn't have far to walk to my car. Well it was going to take at least 5 minutes to unload the groceries into my car. This car stopped in the middle of the parking lot waiting to get my spot just as I was pulling the buggy up to my car. I think he was following me so he could get my spot. His 42-foot long Lincoln Towncar was blocking the entire parking lot waiting and waiting for me to put my stuff in the car. I felt pressured to hurry because I was getting dirty looks from him because he wanted my spot and dirty looks from the rest of the parking lot because they were blocked. The crazy thing is there was another empty spot 3 SPACES DOWN! Does this get on your nerves as bad as it does mine?? Is it really worth it to wait 5 or more minutes and piss everybody off in order to save 10 feet of walking. I mean, really.
AMERICAN IDOL
Auditions are coming up for the next installment of American Idol. I had thought about going, but that is the day I start student teaching. I guess its not meant to be. It just doesn't work out year to year. I actually have NO desire to be an american idol, I'm just obssessed with the show. I would LOVE to meet Paula, Randy, and Simon. You know you're a hardcore American Idol fan when you have been to the AI Concert Tour. (AI is what us hardcore fans like to call it) Some friends of mine and I met in Nashville and attended the American Idol Season One Concert. Unfortunately, they served alcohol so none of us remember much after the first few songs. Later, we all joked about what losers we were for going. Its pretty sad that we paid $50 each and drove to Nashville to attend a concert that was sponsored by PopTarts Snack Stix. I'll never grow up.
DECIDE ON A NAME ALREADY!!!
Everybody knows Sean Combs. He is a famous rapper. Well Sean Combs wasn't working for him, so he changed it to Sean "Puffy" Combs. All was well until he felt like he was outgrowing the name, "Puffy". It was soon changed to "Puff Daddy". Well we thought we had finally reached the end, but no. He later shortened that name to "P Diddy". I guess he got tired of the "P" because now it has been officially changed to just "Diddy". I mean, really. Is all of this necessary? He said that with the new name change he feels like he is letting his guard down and becoming fully exposed. How is dropping one letter from your name and throwing a press conference about it letting your guard down? I love celebrities. I read where 1 in 4 people have what you call "Celebrity Obssession". I am definitely guilty of this, but sometimes I just want to say "GET OVER YOURSELF".
Peace. D-Diddy
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
Dude, really...where is my car?
Seriously...I think its at the End Zone. Not sure. Fun times. I guess it goes without saying that it was a rough night. I don't know why I'm complaining...gotta do it again tonight. Fun times.
I hope everyone enjoys the Senior Portraits. I got some from Chan Drah today...thanks. I think I'm going to post them on Tuesdays.
Moving on.Anyone watch the Teen Choice Awards? I completely forgot. But I found some pics. Let's have a look, shall we?
Could these people try to be trendier? Is that possible? Is anyone else trying to keep their lunch down?
Hill--I love ya. Your mouth is kinda getting freakishly big.
I know I've stated my disdain for all things Simpson, but I can't resist...
Does Ash look a little preggers to anyone?Does Joe remind anyone else of someone that might have to "register" whenever he moves to a new town?
Moving on...apparently 80's sensations Tiffany and Taylor Dane are on tour together, and I think they're playing pseudo-real venues and not malls. No confirmation on that yet. Let's see how they've aged...
Kinda scary, Tay.
When I think about what could've been, makes me wanna cry, too, Tiff.And finally, the musical about John Lennon opened...and look who's still around 
YONO!!!!!!!!
Have a blessed day, children.Oops...almost forgot
We Still Love You!
I hope everyone enjoys the Senior Portraits. I got some from Chan Drah today...thanks. I think I'm going to post them on Tuesdays.
Moving on.Anyone watch the Teen Choice Awards? I completely forgot. But I found some pics. Let's have a look, shall we?
Could these people try to be trendier? Is that possible? Is anyone else trying to keep their lunch down?
Hill--I love ya. Your mouth is kinda getting freakishly big.I know I've stated my disdain for all things Simpson, but I can't resist...
Does Ash look a little preggers to anyone?Does Joe remind anyone else of someone that might have to "register" whenever he moves to a new town?
Moving on...apparently 80's sensations Tiffany and Taylor Dane are on tour together, and I think they're playing pseudo-real venues and not malls. No confirmation on that yet. Let's see how they've aged...
Kinda scary, Tay.
When I think about what could've been, makes me wanna cry, too, Tiff.And finally, the musical about John Lennon opened...and look who's still around 
YONO!!!!!!!!Have a blessed day, children.Oops...almost forgot
We Still Love You!
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
New Obsession
I know this will be hard for some of you to believe, because I don't have an addictive personality, but I am now addicted to finding senior portraits online. This guy Dan used to have a blog that was full of funny ones, but he's taken them down. I am now scouring every corner of the ole www for them. Please send yours in!
Don't try and hide, big girl...we still see you!
Does he have massive forehead and chin scarring?
That's probably her best friend. Judging by the plaid flannel, I don't think anyone else would hang out with her.
Don't look now, but I think there's someone back there about to kill you.
She looks like she's ready to ditch this photo shoot and get back on the softball field.
Is she a senior at exotic dancing school?
Is that a feather duster or an animal corpse or what? Why did she want that in her picture?
He's probably about to go pick up his little brother from tuba lessons...good thing he has the station wagon. Oh, and pick up some milk and eggs.
Why do band kids always think they're so cool? Because they're not.
Um, see above.
That's hot. Poor piano...you know its buckling.
What is this photographer's morbid obsession with formalwear? And why would anyone want to be immortalized in that? Paging Mary Poppins...
Ahhh...the classic.
I'm looking for better ones...if anyone finds any, email me at kmoury2118@aol.com STAT!
Be blessed.
Don't try and hide, big girl...we still see you!
Does he have massive forehead and chin scarring?
That's probably her best friend. Judging by the plaid flannel, I don't think anyone else would hang out with her.
Don't look now, but I think there's someone back there about to kill you.
She looks like she's ready to ditch this photo shoot and get back on the softball field.
Is she a senior at exotic dancing school?
Is that a feather duster or an animal corpse or what? Why did she want that in her picture?
He's probably about to go pick up his little brother from tuba lessons...good thing he has the station wagon. Oh, and pick up some milk and eggs.
Why do band kids always think they're so cool? Because they're not.
Um, see above.
That's hot. Poor piano...you know its buckling.
What is this photographer's morbid obsession with formalwear? And why would anyone want to be immortalized in that? Paging Mary Poppins...
Ahhh...the classic.
I'm looking for better ones...if anyone finds any, email me at kmoury2118@aol.com STAT!
Be blessed.
Still hot.
First of all...we get it. Its summer. Its hot. Let's move on to cooler weather. Or atleast someone hit my paypal account up with enough money for an air conditioner. If you need details, let me know.
Moving on. I'm annoyed by voice mail prompts on cell phones. Why all the instructions? Who has seriously not ever left a voice mail? Who calls someone's voice mail to page that person? Grrr.
Anyway.
Montel has finally lost it. I don't think B.B. King has found it. 
It looks like he's doing the stage production of "Diary of a Mad Black Woman."
Talk about Destiny's Child. She looks thrilled to be with Beyonce.
Marsha, Marsha, MARSHA. Christine, you're not aging so well. Do something about that, please. You were goregous.
Minnie, you MUST stop letting Mary Kate Olsen dress you. Seriously.
Jessica, Ashlee, Joe, and any other Simpson...a year ago, I was loving ya'll. Now, you're on more covers than J'Lo was when she was/wasn't marrying Ben. Sit in a cave for a while. Please.
Why do I feel like I need to wear a condom to watch Tara's new show on E!? Eh, that girl. I mean woman. She is 30.
Seriously, ya'll...Morgan is dating. Who knew she'd be the breakout heartthrob of LB? Take that, Kristen. Slut.
We Miss You! Please Come Back!
Alright...I guess that's all. Hangovers don't cure themselves, nor do they make themselves happen...I have to help them along. Have a blessed day, children.
Moving on. I'm annoyed by voice mail prompts on cell phones. Why all the instructions? Who has seriously not ever left a voice mail? Who calls someone's voice mail to page that person? Grrr.
Anyway.
Montel has finally lost it. I don't think B.B. King has found it. 
It looks like he's doing the stage production of "Diary of a Mad Black Woman."
Talk about Destiny's Child. She looks thrilled to be with Beyonce.
Marsha, Marsha, MARSHA. Christine, you're not aging so well. Do something about that, please. You were goregous.
Minnie, you MUST stop letting Mary Kate Olsen dress you. Seriously.
Jessica, Ashlee, Joe, and any other Simpson...a year ago, I was loving ya'll. Now, you're on more covers than J'Lo was when she was/wasn't marrying Ben. Sit in a cave for a while. Please.
Why do I feel like I need to wear a condom to watch Tara's new show on E!? Eh, that girl. I mean woman. She is 30.
Seriously, ya'll...Morgan is dating. Who knew she'd be the breakout heartthrob of LB? Take that, Kristen. Slut.
We Miss You! Please Come Back!Alright...I guess that's all. Hangovers don't cure themselves, nor do they make themselves happen...I have to help them along. Have a blessed day, children.
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